The Improbable Lens of Society vs. Individuality

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Why is it that going against the “norm” warrants so much hate from those who comply with society's wants and expectations? We praise those who find success from carving their own paths, yet we tear them down every chance we get until they get there. People must sacrifice their place in society to explore their individuality, yet this exact thing can be what leads them to their downfall. 

 In Kate Chopin’s The Awakening, we see the journey of a women leaving the known path of society to a place of seclusion within herself by no means other than the effect that others had on her. This character, Edna Pontellier, is placed within two foil characters, Mademoiselle Reisz and Adèle, who perfectly describe Edna’s, and most people’s, two extremes. As a perfect mother and devout wife, Adèle is the epitome of the result of outward affection by society itself, while Reisz goes through life by the beat of her own drum, unmarried and aggressive, and those around her absolutely despise her for it. The juxtaposition between these two characters perfectly shows the internal turmoil and complexity that Edna has to decide between. 

TED-Ed on Straying the Path


Is going for your dreams and accomplishing your awakening, if you will, worth the negativity and shunning of others? Even in the excerpt from Crying in H Mart by Zauner, we see the battle between a person’s self-path and the plummet of that dream through others opinion, in a very minute scene between mother and daughter. “What if I don’t want to go to college?... My mother looked around the restaurant nervously, as if I had just pledged faith to a satanic commune” (Zauner). Now the power of POV is very strong here as perhaps this girl, Zauner, is exaggerating the negative remarks of her mother, but nonetheless the readers can decipher what is going on. The mom fears her daughter's downfall through the eyes of others. Why else would her first reaction be to look around the restaurant? Why do we as people care so much about others' opinions? What is it in the validation of others that makes us feel more confident in our own journeys?  


This is how I like to see Edna and Zauner:)

Zauner is contradicting the set path to success that her mother wants her to embark on, similarly to how Mrs. Pontellier wants to leave her set path for womanhood and live her own life, but both stories show this complexity through the force of symbolism. Mrs. Pontellier wants to leave her husband, family, and women roles, for a life of independence and self-finding, yet she still wants a man by her side. Edna’s values and diligence of finding her own path can only be seen as an awakening to self, yet the “rebirth” of self is not a one-dimensional condition with the complexities of Edna as a character. The symbolism of birds throughout the story expresses this as Edna, much like a caged bird, is confined only to what society wants from her, but she wants more than anything to break free. Reisz even tells Edna that she must spread her wings if she wants to change, and Mrs. Pontellier does this by moving into a “pigeon” house. Through all of this we see the complexity of her trying to break free, yet she still wants to be loved by a man, Robert.  


Now Robert is an interesting character; we could compare him to a random waitress in the Crying in H Mart lunch scene. He doesn’t really do much, yet he witnesses and is somehow kind of integral to the whole process. This notion of symbolism in a work is also shown in How to Read Literature like a Professor in chapter 12, when he states “Symbols … don’t work so neatly. The thing referred to is likely not reducible to a single statement but will more probably involve a range of possible meanings and interpretations” (Foster 56). Now this can be seen in both stories, for example in Crying in H Mart, the line “She was already in the driver’s seat, using the mirror from the sun flap to pick the gochugaru from her teeth...” (Zauner) can be seen with differing views. Some may say that the gochugaru being picked off the teeth symbolizes the mother picking off her culture from her, being as she feels that she has failed her people with her daughters hopes and wishes, while others may just see it as defeat from the mother's side as she has gone back to an empty car with nothing but her own cursed aspirations for a success ridden life. However people might see this scene, the inconsistency of her two differing ways of parenting is still present, and therefore the central theme of individuality vs society is still intact. 


Little Brain Break: Interview with Zauner on Crying in H Mart




 The complexity of a caring mother who is yet so critical of her child shows a mother daughter bond that is not present in The Awakening, yet in The Awakening we can see the exert from Foster’s story play out when Edna ends up swimming out to shore too far out to return as a result of how society reacted to her, with the symbolism of a bird with a broken wing circling over her. Here biblical allusions were even used to symbolize Edna’s awakening as she goes into the water, but more so, the bird can be viewed very differently to different readers as to how it affects the complexity of the character with regards to her identity. Some may say that it represents Mrs. Pontellier's inability to finish her dream as the bird will struggle to fly from now on, while others could see it as a broken legacy that will be revived by the new generations, because while Edna herself might be dead, her spirit, just like the bird, will live on.  

The inner light of these two characters in these different stories shows how symbolism can affect how a reader sees the complexities within characters, whether it be the mother and daughter having a caring yet strained bond, or Mrs. Pontellier trying to embark on a path of self-journey while still striving for affection from others, I think we all have something to learn from this. Whatever your journey is, at the end of the day, we’re all people trying to figure life out and even if you think you don’t know what's in store for you, just know that one day others will look at your life story and internally judge it, so whatever you do, trust your own intuition and not society’s random opinion- at least I feel like Edna and Zauner would agree with this. :) 



Till next time,
Melodi Yilmaz💕




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